Sunday after service:
We asked JX if she wanted to recieve the gift of tongues. She said yes. So we started to prepare her heart to recieve the gift. I must confess that I was hesitant to pray for her. I knew that it would be difficult to have her to open her mouth to pray with us. What more asking her to practise the new tongue which she would recieve. Is it too much for her at this point of time? I was afraid that this experience would scare her. What if in the end she did not recieve the gift? What will she feel? What if she becomes frightened halfway when the experience gets intense? What if, what if what if... I was doubtful about so many things. But more to it, I was doubtful about God. ..
YW however did not really care so much I guess. She explained what will happen and what JX had to do during the process of recieving tongues. After preparing her heart and getting her into the position of recieving, she started to pray for her. I was beside JX and throughout the entire process, I was constantly intercessing for God's presence and for the power of the holy spirit to come into JX. At first, JX refused to open her mouth. I was a little frustrated as to why she just refused to open her mouth. However, YW was so patient and calm. Throughout the whole time, she constantly encouraged her and kept assuring her that everything is alright and everything will be fine. She need not be afraid because the only people beside her are only God, YW and myself. Gosh, I really need to learn how to be patient. I know that the reason why she's behaving like that is because of deeper things in her life in which she's not yet ready to share with me. But somehow, my patience just grew thin after so many months of seeing her like that. Its so tough, but I guess God is also teaching me on being patient just as how he had been patient with me whenever I was stubborn. Anyway, we prayed for almost an hour before finally, finally she opened her mouth to utter out her first few words in tongues. I was elated! It just made the whole hour worth it! I was so so so glad for her. I felt so privileged to witness the baptism of the holy spirit into my daughter's life. I knew that it was so. Never had I seen her having such as intimate time with the holy spirit. She was actually trembling in the holy spirit and was tearing uncontrollably. (she testified with that too:)
These small milestones of growth in a child's life just makes spiritual mothering so satisfying. Discipling a child is no easy feat. Its really challenging. Looking back, this past few months of discipling JX alone brought back much emotions and memories. My heart was broken so many times. My patience worn thin. I became tired and frustrated. I was disappointed. I cried over her for so many times that my tears grew dry. I wanted to do so much for her, yet I could not. I cried out to God for help as I came to the end of myself. I knew that there was nothing I could do but to pray and commit her life up to the hands of the Almighty. She too came into my life at a time when I was thrown into a time of uncertainty. It was so hard then on learning how to be a good leader. However, it was not all a bed of thorns though. There were times when I prayed and just saw a marked change in her countenance and attitude. I just had to give all thanks to God. It's just so wonderful to see how God is slowly tearing down the barriers and changing her life. I have learnt so much though the process...
To JX- you may not know. But you have taught me so much, so much, so much. I want to thank you. Thank you allowing me to enter your life. Thank you for asking for permission before doing some things. Know that it is such a great priviledge in which God has placed me responsible over your life. I've told you before, but I want to say it again. I love you. Yes, I love you from deep down in my heart. Thats why I correct and rebuke you when I see you doing something which I know God will not be pleased with. I hope you see my heart behind it. I just want to say that I'm truly committed to see you become more and more like Jesus and I would do anything to ensure that it would happen. I believe in you gal. I know you can do it. I see the impossible in you. I see you becoming a leader in the future. God told me that a nation will come from you and I truly believe that it will come to pass one day. It may not seem possible in the eyes of many, but I see it happening. I trust in a God who makes the impossible possible. Believe me, peeps out there. One day you will look at JX and cannot even recognise her. A totally changed person filled with confidence and living in the spirit! What a great testimony to the world then of how God can change a person so much when you allow Him to work in your life!
No comments:
Post a Comment